Evil lurks

June 6, 2006.
06/06/06.
666.

As Newsday warns, Evil lurks, if you take 666 as gospel:

There are those worthless souls who ignore the power of 666; who believe Tuesday- June 6, 2006 - is nothing more than another ordinary mark on the ordinary calendar. They will go about their lives, blind to the blood-curdling evil all around.

Soon, the streets will fill with death and decay.

Soon, scalped chickens will fall from the sky.

Soon, the anti-Christ will rise to render the earth a mosh pit of despair; an empty, rotted stink hole of evil mayhem brought about by all things satanic. Doom will reign! Faces will melt! Alan Thicke will star in a new sitcom! The world will explode! Die! Die! Die!

Or, maybe not.

* * * *

There have been no public warnings; no cries from Pope Benedict to load up on canned goods. And yet, a legitimate biblical tie between 666 and bad stuff seems to exist. As reads Revelation 13:16-18: "He also forced everyone, small and great, rich and poor, free and slave, to receive a mark on his right hand or on his forehead, so that no one could buy or sell unless he had the mark, which is the name of the beast or the number of his name. This calls for wisdom. If anyone has insight, let him calculate the number of the beast, for it is man's number. His number is 666."

By "the beast," is the Bible referring to a three-headed, red-eyed ogre? Unlikely. Instead, most scholars interpret 666 to be the numerical code for Nero, the fifth Roman Emperor (54-68 AD) of the Julio-Claudian dynasty, who ruthlessly persecuted Christians. "The legend of the anti-Christ is that of an agent of Satan empowered to pave the way for the end of times," says Phil Stevens, a professor of anthropology at University at Buffalo and an expert on religious symbolism. "The myth of the anti-Christ has been passed down through the generations. But to start with, it appeared to be simply a very disliked man."

If that's the case, we know that the curse of 666 is true & that the beast roams among us. Who is our leader on this evil day of 666? The ruthless anti-Christ? Who knows. A very disliked man. For sure.

And if that isn't prove positive, The Satirical Political Report notes the publication of THE DaBUSHI CODE:

Following his controversial blockbuster novel, Dan Brown is at it again, attempting to unlock the other great mystery of the world, in his new non-fiction book, The DaBushi Code.

Under Brown’s theory, there has been a massive conspiracy to cover up the fact that George W. Bush is actually the offspring of Satan, who had sex with Barbara Bush as part of Poppy’s initiation ritual into Skull and Bones at Yale.

Brown’s premise is that this is the only logical way to explain Bush’s instigation of a pointless and tragic war in Iraq, his reckless indifference to human life during Katrina, and his failure to seriously address global warming, The Devil’s ultimate revenge against God’s creation of the Earth.

* * * *

The DaBushi Code also postulates that contrary to popular belief, “WMD” had nothing to do with weapons of mass destruction, but actually stands for “W Must Die.” This edict was handed down to Saddam from Satan himself, who was upset that Bush was giving “evil” a bad name.

As Don Davis (who is that rare phenomena, a lawyer with a sense of humor) adds, "The publication of this post on the eve of 6/6/06 is purely coincidental. Or perhaps, as the Public Editor of The New York Times might put it, 'The Devil made us do it.'”

Tags: Political Satire, Humor, 666